Gay Cumbria - Support
Here we have provided some support information and articles, we hope you find them useful. Please note that all experiences differ and each situation should be tackled on its own merit, our support articles are for guidance only.
Please follow the links below.
Coming Out | Cottaging/Cruising | Domestic Abuse | Drink Spiking/Date Rape
Homophobia | FFLAG - (Family & Friends of Lesbians & Gays) | In the Closet
Relationship Break Up | Personal Safety Tips
In The Closet
Because society has been so determined to hide the truth about homosexuality, gay people start out in the closet, not accepting their homosexuality, often not even being able to comprehend the fact that they are gay. The lucky ones come out quickly.
The unlucky stay in the closet all their lives. There is a large grey area around the closet. Some gay people have gay sex and are either so ashamed by it that they won’t even acknowledge their homosexuality to themselves. Others use rationalization to hide from their homosexuality. Perhaps they don’t consider themselves gay because they have families and only have gay sex on the side, or maybe they don’t think they are really gay because they are always on top or because they have gay sex, but don’t fit common stereotypes about gay people. Most closeted folks acknowledge their homosexuality or bisexuality at some level, but are unable to accept or even act on it.
It’s amazing what you can avoid if you simply don’t think about it. I’m amazed that it took me 32 years to realize I like guys a lot. Even though sex is all around us in the media, I was still able to avoid thinking about it. It simply wasn’t interesting. Maybe because everything is 99.9999% heterosexual. If homosexual wasn’t such a taboo and if I had seen some normal homosexual stuff, things might have been different.
I can’t help but think that many in my family knew my orientation long before I knew. I kind of wish that someone would have brought it to my attention. I probably would have flatly denied it at the time; but it may have gotten me thinking years ago.
What I am trying to say is that many people simply don’t know. And then I suppose they are not really in the closet. They are trying to live their daily lives without sex and that special love. I don’t think it’s a waste of a life. But I think it is sad. Let’s hope that, like me, they realize what they are missing before it’s too late.
Don.
